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shadowcaster
2nd December 2009, 06:10 PM
As a public service in this festive season I give you the perfect Christmas Cake Recipe

Ingredients:

* 2 cups flour
* 1 stick butter
* 1 cup of water
* 1 tsp baking soda
* 1 cup of sugar
* 1 tsp salt
* 1 cup of brown sugar
* Lemon juice
* 4 large eggs
* Nuts
* 1 bottle wine
* 2 cups of dried fruit

Sample the wine to check quality. Take a large bowl, check the wine again.

To be sure it is of the highest quality, pour one level cup and drink.
Repeat.

Turn on the electric mixer. Beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl.

Add one teaspoon of sugar. Beat again. At this point it's best to make sure
the wine is still OK. Try another cup... Just in case. Turn off the mixerer
thingy.

Break 2 eggs and add to the bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit.

Pick the frigging fruit up off floor. Mix on the turner.. If the fried druit
gets stuck in the beaterers just pry it loose with a drewscriver. Sample the
wine to check for tonsisticity. Next, sift two cups of salt. Or something.
Check the wine. Now shift the lemon juice and strain your nuts. Add one
table.

Add a spoon of sugar, or some fink. Whatever you can find. Greash the oven.
Turn the cake tin 360 degrees and try not to fall over. Don't forget to beat
off the turner. Finally, throw the bowl through the window. Finish the wine
and

wipe counter with the cat.

Bingle Jells!

Land Locked
3rd December 2009, 01:04 AM
That's pretty good. Have to try it some time.;) Must remember to select a good wine.