duck hunter

[minimad]

A duck hunter was out enjoying a nice morning on the marsh when he decided to take a leak.....
He walked over to a tree and propped up his gun.
Just then a gust of wind blew, the gun fell over, and discharged... Shooting him in the genitals.
Several hours later, lying in a hospital bed, he was approached by his doctor.
'Well sir, I have some good news and some bad news.. The good news is that you are going to be OK. The damage was local to your groin, there was very little internal damage, and we were able to remove all of the buckshot.' 'What's the bad news?' asked the hunter.
'The bad news is that there was some pretty extensive buckshot damage done to your penis. I'm going to have to refer you to my sister.' 'Well I guess that isn't too bad,' the hunter replied. 'Is your sister a plastic surgeon?' 'Not exactly.' answered the doctor.
'She's a flute player in the Symphony orchestra. She's going to teach you where to put your fingers so you don't pee in your eye.'

[flyerncle]

OAP goes to doctor, I need Viagra Doc, Why do you need Viagra.I just need it.Doctor : I cant see why you need it you are widowed. OAP:Ok just half of one then. Doctor :Whats that going to do? OAP: Stop me peeing on my shoes!

[Bonzo]

An elderly couple went for a romantic walk in the countryside to celebrate their golden wedding anniversary.

They came to a large tree next to the foot path.

She said " My, look how big that tree has grown in the last 50 years "

He said " Look, that little pickett fence is still behind that tree " " Do you remember the time I gave you one against that fence "

She said " Yes ,it only seems like yesterday "

He said " How about it for old times sake "

She said " Why not, there is nobody about for miles "

They went behind the tree, he gave her a right good seeing to.

She said " Oh my god that was fantastic, you never went at it so hard 50 years ago " !!??

He Said " That bloody fence wasn't electric 50 years ago "